Someone sent me this email and i thought i should include it here.
To those who are married, .. Not married .. and soon to be married
When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and
said, I've got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly.
Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.
Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know
what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly.
She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly,
why?
I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the
chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn't
talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what
had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory
answer; she had lost my heart to Dew. I didn't love her anymore. I just
pitied her!
With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated
that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company.
She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent
ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for
her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I
had said for I loved Dew so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of
me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a
kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several
weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.
The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something
at the table. I didn't have supper but went straight to sleep and fell
asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Dew.
When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not
care so I turned over and was asleep again.
In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want
anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce.
She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal
a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a
month's time and she didn't want to disrupt him with our broken
marriage.
This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to
recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day.
She requested that everyday for the month's duration I carry her out of
our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going
crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd
request.
I told Dew about my wife's divorce conditions.. She laughed loudly and
thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to
face the divorce, she said scornfully.
My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was
explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we
both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mummy
in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to
the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in
my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don't tell our son about
the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside
the door... She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the
office.
On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my
chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I
hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she
was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair
was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I
wondered what I had done to her.
On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy
returning... This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to
me.
On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was
growing again. I didn't tell Dew about this. It became easier to carry
her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me
stronger.
She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few
dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my
dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so
thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily...
Suddenly it hit me... she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her
heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.
Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it's time to carry mum out.
To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an
essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer
and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I
might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms,
walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her
hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly;
it was just like our wedding day.
But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held
her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I
held her tightly and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lacked
intimacy.
I drove to office... jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the
door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind... I walked
upstairs. Dew opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Dew, I do not
want the divorce anymore.
She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have
a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Dew, I said, I
won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I
didn't value the details of our lives, not because we didn't love each
other any more. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on
our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart.
Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed
the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away.
At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my
wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and
wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.
That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I
run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed - dead.
The small details of your lives are what really matter in a
relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the
bank, blah..blah..blah. These create an environment conducive for
happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be
your spouse's friend and do those little things for each other that
build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!
If you don't share this, nothing will happen to you.
If you do, you just might save a marriage.
"Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing. {Proverbs 12:18}"
Thursday, 29 July 2010
Tuesday, 13 July 2010
What is my true purpose in my marriage and in my life? part 2
The human is being.
The human is the Body and the being is the life Spirit breathed in by God. BASICALLY God entered the human and started living in the restricted house he built for himself. God can perfectly live as the absolute everything as well as the smallest thing. Apart and engaged he can be. So in order to enjoy the earth God took a part of himself that carried all of his attributes and entered the human house we call the body. Here he is restricted to whatever rule that human man decide to live by until it discovers that the body is not the person.
So the rule by which God lives in the human seems to be as follows.
- Created a human
- In my image
- In my likeness
- Enter him and undergo a process of forgetful reawakening.
- I forget who I am,
- I become defined by my environment
- When I get tired and begin to wonder what the purpose of this is all about
- I begin a journey of rediscovering who I truly am
- I re- member
- I re- wind
- I re- new
- I re- turn
- I re- born
So God still the ultimate absolute, for his own play and enjoyment created Clones of himself in the greatest game of all called the game of being.
The human bit is the body, which is the most complex organism in the universe so profound it is a universe of its own. Scientists are just beginning to discover so many aspects of just this body but they would have saved time if they had asked the spiritual adepts such as Pythagoras, Socrates, and Jesus Christ. All the same in this great game, the creator has put down the rules of engagements which is as follows
- Scientists must use the tools created by them to discover what they cannot see with the naked eye.
- The spiritual people will know what they have not proved with material creations
- Scientists will confirm what the others have known without proof
- When the two sides work together greater things will be discovered and many woes will seize as a result of the eradication of ego and dogma.
So we have this game being played for generations. In every century a few people will be given glimpses into the other world and they will bring to our dimensions what science calls a breakthrough and the spiritual people call a revelation. It’s all words. And words bring our greatest divisions.
The tower of Babel was used by God to reveal to us that words are our greatest dividers and it was words that caused the idea of separation that has resulted in so much suffering on the planet. Also he subtly gave us the solution all in one breath, Ladies and gentlemen God is awesome. In your greatest weakness comes your greatest strength. From the darkest night comes the brightest day. In your lacking everything comes your owning all things. In your detachment comes your highest enjoyment. In your slavery comes your greatest freedom. Wow. God is indeed a circle.
Back to my discussion, Man, the body is called The human, and man, the spirit is called the human being. To err is indeed human but to forgive is divine. So whenever a human is erring it is a sign that the human is not being but doing; doing to please himself, his household, community, religion of government.
Whenever we act from doing, we stop acting from being. A dog who seats on a toilet is no longer a dog but a human. A human who crawls on its belly is no longer a human but a snake. We were created to be not to do. We spend all our lives doing and not being and wonder why we are so dissatisfied with our lives. We live under the motto of “what will people say” and despise those who have decided not to. We call them lazy and a menace because they do not care what people including you say anymore.
You pretend to be happy when you lie to yourself first and then all around you. When will you learn that the key to your happiness lies in you being true to yourself. Be frank with yourself and you will discover that the only things you will loose in life by your honesty to yourself you do not need to be. They are the things that have dragged you down into the bondage of doing.
The human is the Body and the being is the life Spirit breathed in by God. BASICALLY God entered the human and started living in the restricted house he built for himself. God can perfectly live as the absolute everything as well as the smallest thing. Apart and engaged he can be. So in order to enjoy the earth God took a part of himself that carried all of his attributes and entered the human house we call the body. Here he is restricted to whatever rule that human man decide to live by until it discovers that the body is not the person.
So the rule by which God lives in the human seems to be as follows.
- Created a human
- In my image
- In my likeness
- Enter him and undergo a process of forgetful reawakening.
- I forget who I am,
- I become defined by my environment
- When I get tired and begin to wonder what the purpose of this is all about
- I begin a journey of rediscovering who I truly am
- I re- member
- I re- wind
- I re- new
- I re- turn
- I re- born
So God still the ultimate absolute, for his own play and enjoyment created Clones of himself in the greatest game of all called the game of being.
The human bit is the body, which is the most complex organism in the universe so profound it is a universe of its own. Scientists are just beginning to discover so many aspects of just this body but they would have saved time if they had asked the spiritual adepts such as Pythagoras, Socrates, and Jesus Christ. All the same in this great game, the creator has put down the rules of engagements which is as follows
- Scientists must use the tools created by them to discover what they cannot see with the naked eye.
- The spiritual people will know what they have not proved with material creations
- Scientists will confirm what the others have known without proof
- When the two sides work together greater things will be discovered and many woes will seize as a result of the eradication of ego and dogma.
So we have this game being played for generations. In every century a few people will be given glimpses into the other world and they will bring to our dimensions what science calls a breakthrough and the spiritual people call a revelation. It’s all words. And words bring our greatest divisions.
The tower of Babel was used by God to reveal to us that words are our greatest dividers and it was words that caused the idea of separation that has resulted in so much suffering on the planet. Also he subtly gave us the solution all in one breath, Ladies and gentlemen God is awesome. In your greatest weakness comes your greatest strength. From the darkest night comes the brightest day. In your lacking everything comes your owning all things. In your detachment comes your highest enjoyment. In your slavery comes your greatest freedom. Wow. God is indeed a circle.
Back to my discussion, Man, the body is called The human, and man, the spirit is called the human being. To err is indeed human but to forgive is divine. So whenever a human is erring it is a sign that the human is not being but doing; doing to please himself, his household, community, religion of government.
Whenever we act from doing, we stop acting from being. A dog who seats on a toilet is no longer a dog but a human. A human who crawls on its belly is no longer a human but a snake. We were created to be not to do. We spend all our lives doing and not being and wonder why we are so dissatisfied with our lives. We live under the motto of “what will people say” and despise those who have decided not to. We call them lazy and a menace because they do not care what people including you say anymore.
You pretend to be happy when you lie to yourself first and then all around you. When will you learn that the key to your happiness lies in you being true to yourself. Be frank with yourself and you will discover that the only things you will loose in life by your honesty to yourself you do not need to be. They are the things that have dragged you down into the bondage of doing.
What is my true purpose in my marriage and in my life? part 1
Part 1: The creation of Man
Who really knows the real purpose of marriage?
Some people say that it is for man not to be alone according to the word of God in Gen:2:18
Why, because no companion was found suitable for man amongst the animals and plants.
Think about it. No dog, or bear, or cattle, or cat or house plants of goldfish or snake etc was found by the creator as a suitable helpmate for man.
The definition here of man is the one made in the image of God in who is the life and essence of the creator. The only one given the mandate to create and to dominate and rule all other creations on the earth. The one for whom the earth was created. These sayings are true.
- The earth was made for man and not man for the earth.
- The Sabbath was made for man and not man for the Sabbath
- Work was made for man and not man for work
- Marriage was made for man and not man for marriage
- Man was made for a purpose and that purpose was creating.
The purpose of something can be denoted as to what role it plays in the grand design. Whatever is created last is the greater than what was created first. Jesus pointed to this very subtly in his teachings when he hinted that
“The last shall be first and the first last.” This is not about value and superiority, hierarchy or prestige. This is about the grand purpose of God. If we are to watch the procedure of creation we can tell what really matters to the creator. Before we look at the earth let us look at the production of the computer.
In isolation the plastic for the monitor and key board are of no use to the end user. The aluminum and copper wires make no sense on their own but in the hands of the computer manufacturer somewhere in china, who has the blue prints for the production of the laptop and understands its purpose, each material used is valuable to him and the computer is most valuable to him as the materials on their own are just raw materials, but the laptop is called stock. This can cost 100 times the value of the components that was used in its production. The creator is the only one who values the creature most for S/He alone knows the value of the components that were used in its creation and the time and effort that has gone in producing a prototype and blue print.
Money, time, education, resources have all gone into the production of the laptop. It took more of these to produce the very first one than the latest one. Anyway, my point here is that the Creator alone knows the value he placed on your life. He created Man last and all the components to ensure its survival and function first. Let us take a look at the process for the manufacture of the human being.
First, Darkness. The earth was non and void and darkness covered the face of the deep. What does that mean? It means that we have here the necessary elements for the big bang to happen on cue. In Steven Hawkins universe, it shows vividly how messy this non and void darkness thing was. It was like being in a nightmarish state from within. It was also awesome.
I really think that the person who wrote this account had a similar experience. Anyway it is recorded that the spirit of God was moving over the waters . So we know that water was not created at the beginning of the earth as we know it. Water is part of God.
Then on cue God said, “Light come forth” and we know what happened next. Bang!!!!!!. Here comes the big bang. I will not waste my time here telling you about the rest of the theory suffice it to say that scientists have been playing catch up with spirit ever since. I do admire them and respect their quest for knowledge. God enjoys revealing his secrets to those who will take the time to ask him.
Anyway, the scene was set for the rest of God’s creation. Steven Hawkins called his unexplained “Luck”. For lack of a better word I call it God. Anyway we now have light, the main sustenance of all life forms yet to be created and the ultimate sustenance of the greatest creation for which all this was formed, MAN.
The plants, then animals and birds and their various evolutionary states to Man. God Formed man out of the earth, that means out of all the elements he had just created. Science can prove that the body of, man is made up of all the elements in our atmosphere. So we know that if man can control his body he will control the earth. That is what God meant when he said have dominion over the whole earth. That means over your body first and the rest of the earth will obey you. We have discovered that people who have powers over the elements of the universe are highly focused and self controlled human beings.
Why because they have learnt how to control the number one force , their body and all the elements that make it up.
Repeat after me, I am the earth and the earth is me. I and the earth are one.
So the elements, wind, water, fire, air, earth, etc are all in our bodies. So are all the colours we see and all the lights we see. Basically what you are looking at everyday is yourself but repackaged. So treat well what you see and you will be treated well in return.
This is why we must look after our environment. It was put in place to sustain us. Just like a laptop will spoil if put in fire or water so our bodies will be destroyed if exposed to similar conditions. No one in their right mind will deliberately pour water or expose their laptop to fire for they know the consequences of their actions. Likewise we as human beings must stop subjecting our living environment to disaster causing behaviors and actions. We must take better care of ourselves by taking good care of our environment. We can all live without money but we will all perish with all the money in the world and pollution.
It is time for us to have our priorities right. The pursuit of wealth and power at the cost of the universe is the most bizarre suicidal bid mankind has ever embarked on. Where do we intend to live will bag loads of money and no home? In the air? These points need a lot of time and I am only dishing out a few pointers for you to go and think about.
Now back to the earth. Man has a special relationship to the earth as follows
- The earth was made for man
- Man was made to rule over the earth
- Man was made to dress and keep the earth
- Man will perish without the earth
- Man must understand it’s relationship with the earth
The woman was made from the man according to the Good book Gen 2:18-25
Let us now look at this in detail
Man, was formed from the dust of the earth and God breathed into man his life and made became a Human Being.
Who really knows the real purpose of marriage?
Some people say that it is for man not to be alone according to the word of God in Gen:2:18
Why, because no companion was found suitable for man amongst the animals and plants.
Think about it. No dog, or bear, or cattle, or cat or house plants of goldfish or snake etc was found by the creator as a suitable helpmate for man.
The definition here of man is the one made in the image of God in who is the life and essence of the creator. The only one given the mandate to create and to dominate and rule all other creations on the earth. The one for whom the earth was created. These sayings are true.
- The earth was made for man and not man for the earth.
- The Sabbath was made for man and not man for the Sabbath
- Work was made for man and not man for work
- Marriage was made for man and not man for marriage
- Man was made for a purpose and that purpose was creating.
The purpose of something can be denoted as to what role it plays in the grand design. Whatever is created last is the greater than what was created first. Jesus pointed to this very subtly in his teachings when he hinted that
“The last shall be first and the first last.” This is not about value and superiority, hierarchy or prestige. This is about the grand purpose of God. If we are to watch the procedure of creation we can tell what really matters to the creator. Before we look at the earth let us look at the production of the computer.
In isolation the plastic for the monitor and key board are of no use to the end user. The aluminum and copper wires make no sense on their own but in the hands of the computer manufacturer somewhere in china, who has the blue prints for the production of the laptop and understands its purpose, each material used is valuable to him and the computer is most valuable to him as the materials on their own are just raw materials, but the laptop is called stock. This can cost 100 times the value of the components that was used in its production. The creator is the only one who values the creature most for S/He alone knows the value of the components that were used in its creation and the time and effort that has gone in producing a prototype and blue print.
Money, time, education, resources have all gone into the production of the laptop. It took more of these to produce the very first one than the latest one. Anyway, my point here is that the Creator alone knows the value he placed on your life. He created Man last and all the components to ensure its survival and function first. Let us take a look at the process for the manufacture of the human being.
First, Darkness. The earth was non and void and darkness covered the face of the deep. What does that mean? It means that we have here the necessary elements for the big bang to happen on cue. In Steven Hawkins universe, it shows vividly how messy this non and void darkness thing was. It was like being in a nightmarish state from within. It was also awesome.
I really think that the person who wrote this account had a similar experience. Anyway it is recorded that the spirit of God was moving over the waters . So we know that water was not created at the beginning of the earth as we know it. Water is part of God.
Then on cue God said, “Light come forth” and we know what happened next. Bang!!!!!!. Here comes the big bang. I will not waste my time here telling you about the rest of the theory suffice it to say that scientists have been playing catch up with spirit ever since. I do admire them and respect their quest for knowledge. God enjoys revealing his secrets to those who will take the time to ask him.
Anyway, the scene was set for the rest of God’s creation. Steven Hawkins called his unexplained “Luck”. For lack of a better word I call it God. Anyway we now have light, the main sustenance of all life forms yet to be created and the ultimate sustenance of the greatest creation for which all this was formed, MAN.
The plants, then animals and birds and their various evolutionary states to Man. God Formed man out of the earth, that means out of all the elements he had just created. Science can prove that the body of, man is made up of all the elements in our atmosphere. So we know that if man can control his body he will control the earth. That is what God meant when he said have dominion over the whole earth. That means over your body first and the rest of the earth will obey you. We have discovered that people who have powers over the elements of the universe are highly focused and self controlled human beings.
Why because they have learnt how to control the number one force , their body and all the elements that make it up.
Repeat after me, I am the earth and the earth is me. I and the earth are one.
So the elements, wind, water, fire, air, earth, etc are all in our bodies. So are all the colours we see and all the lights we see. Basically what you are looking at everyday is yourself but repackaged. So treat well what you see and you will be treated well in return.
This is why we must look after our environment. It was put in place to sustain us. Just like a laptop will spoil if put in fire or water so our bodies will be destroyed if exposed to similar conditions. No one in their right mind will deliberately pour water or expose their laptop to fire for they know the consequences of their actions. Likewise we as human beings must stop subjecting our living environment to disaster causing behaviors and actions. We must take better care of ourselves by taking good care of our environment. We can all live without money but we will all perish with all the money in the world and pollution.
It is time for us to have our priorities right. The pursuit of wealth and power at the cost of the universe is the most bizarre suicidal bid mankind has ever embarked on. Where do we intend to live will bag loads of money and no home? In the air? These points need a lot of time and I am only dishing out a few pointers for you to go and think about.
Now back to the earth. Man has a special relationship to the earth as follows
- The earth was made for man
- Man was made to rule over the earth
- Man was made to dress and keep the earth
- Man will perish without the earth
- Man must understand it’s relationship with the earth
The woman was made from the man according to the Good book Gen 2:18-25
Let us now look at this in detail
Man, was formed from the dust of the earth and God breathed into man his life and made became a Human Being.
Self Evaluation questions on why I chose my spouse as my life partner
Why I married.
Love, mum and dad, biological clock ticking, I got pregnant, security, fear of loneliness and failure, peer pressure, immigration, sex, running away from my sexuality issues, Status improvement, money or religion.
Why I choose my spouse.
-They fulfilled one of the above.
-They were available
-I could take advantage of them
-They love me.
- It was the will of God
They are handsome, beautiful, had a nice car, money, house, educated, intelligent, had prospects, soul mate God told me to do it, pressure from family, culture, tribe they were the father mother of my child they were my friend.
Did I have a vision for my marriage?
Yes.
-To have children, to show that I can be married too.
-To help in my job and ministry.
-For somebody to take care of me.
-To love and to be loved.
-To gain security financially and emotionally.
-To have someone to can call my own.
-To become fully acceptable and respected in my community.
NO
-I just wanted to get married to be with my partner forever.
Is the Vision for your marriage being fulfilled.
Yes
No.
Do I really know what I wanted when I got married?
No, I was still a child mentally.
Yes, I had it all planned out.
Do I really know what I want in life now?
Is it set in stone or will my desires change with time? Why?
Have I made contingency plans if my desires change with time?
Am I prepared to give my spouse the same grace that their desires will grow and change with time? If not why not?
Love, mum and dad, biological clock ticking, I got pregnant, security, fear of loneliness and failure, peer pressure, immigration, sex, running away from my sexuality issues, Status improvement, money or religion.
Why I choose my spouse.
-They fulfilled one of the above.
-They were available
-I could take advantage of them
-They love me.
- It was the will of God
They are handsome, beautiful, had a nice car, money, house, educated, intelligent, had prospects, soul mate God told me to do it, pressure from family, culture, tribe they were the father mother of my child they were my friend.
Did I have a vision for my marriage?
Yes.
-To have children, to show that I can be married too.
-To help in my job and ministry.
-For somebody to take care of me.
-To love and to be loved.
-To gain security financially and emotionally.
-To have someone to can call my own.
-To become fully acceptable and respected in my community.
NO
-I just wanted to get married to be with my partner forever.
Is the Vision for your marriage being fulfilled.
Yes
No.
Do I really know what I wanted when I got married?
No, I was still a child mentally.
Yes, I had it all planned out.
Do I really know what I want in life now?
Is it set in stone or will my desires change with time? Why?
Have I made contingency plans if my desires change with time?
Am I prepared to give my spouse the same grace that their desires will grow and change with time? If not why not?
Ignorance – Our worst Enemy
Why is God so much against ignorance? Because it is your greatest enemy. It is the ignorance of yourself that causes the ego in you to rule as king. The psalmist understood this so well and that is why he said in. Ecl. 10:7 “I have seen slaves on horses, and princes walking like slaves on the earth” Why, because the real you has submitted itself to the conditions that it thinks is necessary for self preservation. Jesus said deny your flesh. He actually meant deny the ego its cravings for whatever that may be. It could be for power, money, fame, food, recognition, and prestige whatever. Is it because the lord does not want you to enjoy these things? No. it is because the pursuant of these things drown you in a false identity. Your attachment to these things will rob you of discovering who you are. If you truly know who you are then your enjoying these things will be for a purpose.
My pastor always says that when the purpose of a thing is not known then abuse is imminent. If your desire for fame is to give you identity, then you have not truly discovered the true purpose of fame. If you discover your true identity then you will wonder whether fame will serve you fulfilling your divine purpose or hinder it.
If your true identity is a leader then perhaps fame is a tool to bring you to fulfillment. If your true purpose in life is to train a few people in the art of deep union with God then fame will distract you.
I hope you get my point.
Discover who you are you will choose what happens to you. You will not happen to the world. Coming back to marriage all of you here have made the decision to marry. I will now like you to explore in your mind why you really got married. Be true to yourself this is a journey in self discovery without guilt, condemnation or judgment. Be true to yourself. Ask the hard question.
1 . Why did I really get married? The answer is already on your tongue. Write down every reason your mind comes up with and keep probing it.
2. Why did I choose my spouse as a marriage partner?
3. Did I have a vision for my marriage?
4. Is that vision being fulfilled?
5.Do I really know what I wanted when I got married?
6. Do I know what I want now?
7. What is my real purpose in life and why do I think it is?
These are personal questions for your eyes only. You need to understand yourself so that you can fully function in a marriage relationship. Understanding your priorities is the key to that.
Through skillful and godly Wisdom is a house (a life, a home, a family) built, and by understanding it is established [on a sound and good foundation. And by knowledge shall its chambers [of every area] be filled with all precious and pleasant riches PROV 24:3-4amp
If you want to enjoy the ultimate absolute in any given area without fantasy and dream then get the knowledge of that thing and get true knowledge of it.
When we come back we will tackle the answers and face the demons that we have been hiding from all this time. Jesus said that he hates hypocrites so let us use the light to expose the darkness and clean out the cobwebs of our lives.
My pastor always says that when the purpose of a thing is not known then abuse is imminent. If your desire for fame is to give you identity, then you have not truly discovered the true purpose of fame. If you discover your true identity then you will wonder whether fame will serve you fulfilling your divine purpose or hinder it.
If your true identity is a leader then perhaps fame is a tool to bring you to fulfillment. If your true purpose in life is to train a few people in the art of deep union with God then fame will distract you.
I hope you get my point.
Discover who you are you will choose what happens to you. You will not happen to the world. Coming back to marriage all of you here have made the decision to marry. I will now like you to explore in your mind why you really got married. Be true to yourself this is a journey in self discovery without guilt, condemnation or judgment. Be true to yourself. Ask the hard question.
1 . Why did I really get married? The answer is already on your tongue. Write down every reason your mind comes up with and keep probing it.
2. Why did I choose my spouse as a marriage partner?
3. Did I have a vision for my marriage?
4. Is that vision being fulfilled?
5.Do I really know what I wanted when I got married?
6. Do I know what I want now?
7. What is my real purpose in life and why do I think it is?
These are personal questions for your eyes only. You need to understand yourself so that you can fully function in a marriage relationship. Understanding your priorities is the key to that.
Through skillful and godly Wisdom is a house (a life, a home, a family) built, and by understanding it is established [on a sound and good foundation. And by knowledge shall its chambers [of every area] be filled with all precious and pleasant riches PROV 24:3-4amp
If you want to enjoy the ultimate absolute in any given area without fantasy and dream then get the knowledge of that thing and get true knowledge of it.
When we come back we will tackle the answers and face the demons that we have been hiding from all this time. Jesus said that he hates hypocrites so let us use the light to expose the darkness and clean out the cobwebs of our lives.
Ignorance – Our worst Enemy
Why is God so much against ignorance? Because it is your greatest enemy. It is the ignorance of yourself that causes the ego in you to rule as king. The psalmist understood this so well and that is why he said in. Ecl. 10:7 “I have seen slaves on horses, and princes walking like slaves on the earth” Why, because the real you has submitted itself to the conditions that it thinks is necessary for self preservation. Jesus said deny your flesh. He actually meant deny the ego its cravings for whatever that may be. It could be for power, money, fame, food, recognition, and prestige whatever. Is it because the lord does not want you to enjoy these things? No. it is because the pursuant of these things drown you in a false identity. Your attachment to these things will rob you of discovering who you are. If you truly know who you are then your enjoying these things will be for a purpose.
My pastor always says that when the purpose of a thing is not known then abuse is imminent. If your desire for fame is to give you identity, then you have not truly discovered the true purpose of fame. If you discover your true identity then you will wonder whether fame will serve you fulfilling your divine purpose or hinder it.
If your true identity is a leader then perhaps fame is a tool to bring you to fulfillment. If your true purpose in life is to train a few people in the art of deep union with God then fame will distract you.
I hope you get my point.
Discover who you are you will choose what happens to you. You will not happen to the world. Coming back to marriage all of you here have made the decision to marry. I will now like you to explore in your mind why you really got married. Be true to yourself this is a journey in self discovery without guilt, condemnation or judgment. Be true to yourself. Ask the hard question.
1 . Why did I really get married? The answer is already on your tongue. Write down every reason your mind comes up with and keep probing it.
2. Why did I choose my spouse as a marriage partner?
3. Did I have a vision for my marriage?
4. Is that vision being fulfilled?
5.Do I really know what I wanted when I got married?
6. Do I know what I want now?
7. What is my real purpose in life and why do I think it is?
These are personal questions for your eyes only. You need to understand yourself so that you can fully function in a marriage relationship. Understanding your priorities is the key to that.
Through skillful and godly Wisdom is a house (a life, a home, a family) built, and by understanding it is established [on a sound and good foundation. And by knowledge shall its chambers [of every area] be filled with all precious and pleasant riches PROV 24:3-4amp
If you want to enjoy the ultimate absolute in any given area without fantasy and dream then get the knowledge of that thing and get true knowledge of it.
When we come back we will tackle the answers and face the demons that we have been hiding from all this time. Jesus said that he hates hypocrites so let us use the light to expose the darkness and clean out the cobwebs of our lives.
My pastor always says that when the purpose of a thing is not known then abuse is imminent. If your desire for fame is to give you identity, then you have not truly discovered the true purpose of fame. If you discover your true identity then you will wonder whether fame will serve you fulfilling your divine purpose or hinder it.
If your true identity is a leader then perhaps fame is a tool to bring you to fulfillment. If your true purpose in life is to train a few people in the art of deep union with God then fame will distract you.
I hope you get my point.
Discover who you are you will choose what happens to you. You will not happen to the world. Coming back to marriage all of you here have made the decision to marry. I will now like you to explore in your mind why you really got married. Be true to yourself this is a journey in self discovery without guilt, condemnation or judgment. Be true to yourself. Ask the hard question.
1 . Why did I really get married? The answer is already on your tongue. Write down every reason your mind comes up with and keep probing it.
2. Why did I choose my spouse as a marriage partner?
3. Did I have a vision for my marriage?
4. Is that vision being fulfilled?
5.Do I really know what I wanted when I got married?
6. Do I know what I want now?
7. What is my real purpose in life and why do I think it is?
These are personal questions for your eyes only. You need to understand yourself so that you can fully function in a marriage relationship. Understanding your priorities is the key to that.
Through skillful and godly Wisdom is a house (a life, a home, a family) built, and by understanding it is established [on a sound and good foundation. And by knowledge shall its chambers [of every area] be filled with all precious and pleasant riches PROV 24:3-4amp
If you want to enjoy the ultimate absolute in any given area without fantasy and dream then get the knowledge of that thing and get true knowledge of it.
When we come back we will tackle the answers and face the demons that we have been hiding from all this time. Jesus said that he hates hypocrites so let us use the light to expose the darkness and clean out the cobwebs of our lives.
To be or not to be, that's the question.
Most people prefer to live on the surface of their lives and run away from themselves through, work, sex, and affairs of life. In order to grow and be truly fulfilled one must look inward and prepare yourself to answer the hard questions. God said in Isaiah. Chap 2: “come now let us reason together” “If you are willing and obedient you will eat the good of the land”
What does that really mean? Willingness to discover the good and bad, strength and weaknesses, ignorance and wisdom that has all been bundled up to create what you have called me or I.
You are the compilation of memories and conditioning, nothing more. Unless you consider yourself squarely, you will be living a lie for the rest of your life. You might end up achieving a lot in life, money, fame, power but you will still lack the ultimate fulfillment because you have hid yourself from the truth about you.
The bible has shown you who you are but how many people really understand that.
Ask the hard questions and you will come to the truth about yourself. When you truly know who you are then no task will be impossible for you. You will not spend time doing what others say but what will bring you ultimate fulfillment and what will make you do the will of God. Your true purpose in life that will bring you ultimate fulfillment is directly linked with your God purpose.
Jesus said it clearly. My meat is to do the father’s will and to complete it. Had Jesus listened to his culture and religion at that time, he will be married with children and doing carpentry. He will be making ends meet and living a mediocre existence. But he went to the wilderness and asked himself the hard questions. 3 times he was tried by the devil until he fully realized his true identity.
The word of God said that after that, angels ministered to him. He was endued with power from on high and he came out of the wilderness full of the Holy Ghost and power. Fully aware of his life’s purpose and not once did he deviate from it.
Most of us start out in life wanting to be like the Jones. We criticize those few souls who have discovered their true calling and are actively pursuing it whether or not it will make them rich. We all start out wanting to make a lot of money so that we do not have to know what it truly means to depend on God for our daily bread.
We become copy cats. We invest a lot of money to have other people tell us what things mean and how life is to work for us. We copy other people’s way of life and philosophies and we make them our own. We listen to everybody except the spirit of God. When we do listen and it sounds a bit farfetched from the general status quo of the community that we live in, we bind it and send it to hell or we lay it down and continue the 9 to 5 rat race.
Why? It is because of fear. Fear of the wilderness experience. Fear of the 40days without food and shelter and full of mind bombardment. 40 days of asking the hard questions and sometimes wrestling with the answers that seems absurd. Yes, the fear of discovering our true self is why we prefer the safe route of ignorance. But the Father already said. My people perish because of lack of knowledge. Or they are led into captivity. Ask of me and I will answer and show you great and mighty things that you know not of. Come to me all you are heavy laden. Learn from me and you will find rest for your souls. He instructed Isaiah in 6:9-12 tell them to continue being ignorant until they all perish and the land they once lived in is devastated. “Otherwise, if they turn to me I will heal them” He said.
What does that really mean? Willingness to discover the good and bad, strength and weaknesses, ignorance and wisdom that has all been bundled up to create what you have called me or I.
You are the compilation of memories and conditioning, nothing more. Unless you consider yourself squarely, you will be living a lie for the rest of your life. You might end up achieving a lot in life, money, fame, power but you will still lack the ultimate fulfillment because you have hid yourself from the truth about you.
The bible has shown you who you are but how many people really understand that.
Ask the hard questions and you will come to the truth about yourself. When you truly know who you are then no task will be impossible for you. You will not spend time doing what others say but what will bring you ultimate fulfillment and what will make you do the will of God. Your true purpose in life that will bring you ultimate fulfillment is directly linked with your God purpose.
Jesus said it clearly. My meat is to do the father’s will and to complete it. Had Jesus listened to his culture and religion at that time, he will be married with children and doing carpentry. He will be making ends meet and living a mediocre existence. But he went to the wilderness and asked himself the hard questions. 3 times he was tried by the devil until he fully realized his true identity.
The word of God said that after that, angels ministered to him. He was endued with power from on high and he came out of the wilderness full of the Holy Ghost and power. Fully aware of his life’s purpose and not once did he deviate from it.
Most of us start out in life wanting to be like the Jones. We criticize those few souls who have discovered their true calling and are actively pursuing it whether or not it will make them rich. We all start out wanting to make a lot of money so that we do not have to know what it truly means to depend on God for our daily bread.
We become copy cats. We invest a lot of money to have other people tell us what things mean and how life is to work for us. We copy other people’s way of life and philosophies and we make them our own. We listen to everybody except the spirit of God. When we do listen and it sounds a bit farfetched from the general status quo of the community that we live in, we bind it and send it to hell or we lay it down and continue the 9 to 5 rat race.
Why? It is because of fear. Fear of the wilderness experience. Fear of the 40days without food and shelter and full of mind bombardment. 40 days of asking the hard questions and sometimes wrestling with the answers that seems absurd. Yes, the fear of discovering our true self is why we prefer the safe route of ignorance. But the Father already said. My people perish because of lack of knowledge. Or they are led into captivity. Ask of me and I will answer and show you great and mighty things that you know not of. Come to me all you are heavy laden. Learn from me and you will find rest for your souls. He instructed Isaiah in 6:9-12 tell them to continue being ignorant until they all perish and the land they once lived in is devastated. “Otherwise, if they turn to me I will heal them” He said.
Understanding the foundation of marriage
In order to start working on ultimate intimacy one must go back to the beginning and ask the hard questions. Shakespeare once wrote
This above all:
To thine own self be true,
for it must follow as dost the night the day,
that canst not then be false to any man.
- Shakespeare (Hamlet) inspired by Socrates (Know thyself
How many people here have a formal education?
How many years have you been educated? I mean from nursery to PHD. How much time do you think you have spent in exams and studying exams? How many of you passed all your exams first time around. How much money do you think has been spent on your education? Has it all been worthwhile?
How many years have you spend on a formal education about marriage? How many exams have you taken in this area? How much time have you spent studying to pass these exams? How many of you have first time passes. How much money have you invested in educating yourself about your marriage and building the marriage? I am not asking about the children here.
Now compare the 2 together. Which of these 2 have you spent the greatest energy. Which of these two is going to be there for you till you death do you part? Which of these 2 do you want to make the most priority in your life and why.
This above all:
To thine own self be true,
for it must follow as dost the night the day,
that canst not then be false to any man.
- Shakespeare (Hamlet) inspired by Socrates (Know thyself
How many people here have a formal education?
How many years have you been educated? I mean from nursery to PHD. How much time do you think you have spent in exams and studying exams? How many of you passed all your exams first time around. How much money do you think has been spent on your education? Has it all been worthwhile?
How many years have you spend on a formal education about marriage? How many exams have you taken in this area? How much time have you spent studying to pass these exams? How many of you have first time passes. How much money have you invested in educating yourself about your marriage and building the marriage? I am not asking about the children here.
Now compare the 2 together. Which of these 2 have you spent the greatest energy. Which of these two is going to be there for you till you death do you part? Which of these 2 do you want to make the most priority in your life and why.
Monday, 12 July 2010
Removing the plank from your eye in order to be able to view the speck from your spouse's.
A very wise man once commented that in order for you to see the speck of dust in another man's eye, you must first remove the huge plank of wood in your own eye. I find that statement very interesting and truthfull. It simply means that what ever fault you find in others, you have as a bigger fault in your own life. Thinking about it I believe that we are able to recognise the faults in others because we have failed to deal with it in our lives.
More so in marraige. We hear the comments about my wife or husband is not doing or is doing this and that and the picture always looks so bleak. What exactly did you expect?. The other half is in your life to make you whole. If you ask to be more loving, You are not going to recieve a nice poodle. No! you are going to get a raving mad dog who barks all night to test your love. Our dear partners are our best teachers, each individually designed to bring out the God image we have so carelessly forgotten we carry. They are designed to push, pull, drag and beat us into shape. Like the panel beater whose job is to beat the wrecked car's body back into its smooth curves, out partners job is to bring out our God image and likeness. They have been equiped with all the right tools . We may view these tools as ungodly, Evil, hurtfull, painful and even abusive.
Only our source knows who we really are and we are linked to the I. So we do know who we are but have eaten the bread of forgetfulness.Out partners are the antidote to forgetfulness and with each of them we will learn to bear all the God fruits if we really want to get to and become all of who we truely are. Most of the break-ups, divorces and seperations occur because one or more party in the relationship is not yet ready to 'grow up' or mature into their God image. They still think this is all there is and they do not want to grow into a matured God - Man.
Are you all of god yet?
Do these God Fruits grow from your life on a moment by moment basis or are they still a rare occurrence. Check them out and see.
LOVE, JOY, PEACE, PATIENCE, KINDNESS, GOODNESS, FAITHFULNESS, GENTLENESS AND SELF- CONTOL.
Yep!!
They are theGod Friuts. The closer you are to Godhood The more of these will become natural in your daily existence. You are these in essence but you have been trying to be it or fight against it so the fight continues. A dog does not fight to be a Dog. It knows it is one. 'You are Gods' Said Jesus the Christ. Stop trying to be it. Stop trying to not be it. It is the destinity of all humanity. The Source has never failed yet. He said at the beginning of this time"Let us make man in our image" He will get what he desired. So you can fight it, Rebel, Sing songs against it, Make new movies, hold discussion, lift placards and even have 'mid life crisises' to try and be something you were not created to be. Check it ou;- all the laptops that are not working as laptops are in the dump yard. If you do not be who you are you life on earth will feel like you are in the human dumpyard.
Its your choice. Grow up and take your place.
Be God in your community and make your marraige work. The whole creation is waiting for you to take your place. Rise to the challenge..............................................
More so in marraige. We hear the comments about my wife or husband is not doing or is doing this and that and the picture always looks so bleak. What exactly did you expect?. The other half is in your life to make you whole. If you ask to be more loving, You are not going to recieve a nice poodle. No! you are going to get a raving mad dog who barks all night to test your love. Our dear partners are our best teachers, each individually designed to bring out the God image we have so carelessly forgotten we carry. They are designed to push, pull, drag and beat us into shape. Like the panel beater whose job is to beat the wrecked car's body back into its smooth curves, out partners job is to bring out our God image and likeness. They have been equiped with all the right tools . We may view these tools as ungodly, Evil, hurtfull, painful and even abusive.
Only our source knows who we really are and we are linked to the I. So we do know who we are but have eaten the bread of forgetfulness.Out partners are the antidote to forgetfulness and with each of them we will learn to bear all the God fruits if we really want to get to and become all of who we truely are. Most of the break-ups, divorces and seperations occur because one or more party in the relationship is not yet ready to 'grow up' or mature into their God image. They still think this is all there is and they do not want to grow into a matured God - Man.
Are you all of god yet?
Do these God Fruits grow from your life on a moment by moment basis or are they still a rare occurrence. Check them out and see.
LOVE, JOY, PEACE, PATIENCE, KINDNESS, GOODNESS, FAITHFULNESS, GENTLENESS AND SELF- CONTOL.
Yep!!
They are theGod Friuts. The closer you are to Godhood The more of these will become natural in your daily existence. You are these in essence but you have been trying to be it or fight against it so the fight continues. A dog does not fight to be a Dog. It knows it is one. 'You are Gods' Said Jesus the Christ. Stop trying to be it. Stop trying to not be it. It is the destinity of all humanity. The Source has never failed yet. He said at the beginning of this time"Let us make man in our image" He will get what he desired. So you can fight it, Rebel, Sing songs against it, Make new movies, hold discussion, lift placards and even have 'mid life crisises' to try and be something you were not created to be. Check it ou;- all the laptops that are not working as laptops are in the dump yard. If you do not be who you are you life on earth will feel like you are in the human dumpyard.
Its your choice. Grow up and take your place.
Be God in your community and make your marraige work. The whole creation is waiting for you to take your place. Rise to the challenge..............................................
To Thyself be true
Who am I? Is the Question. How many people can correctly answer this question? In order to know the answer we have to go back to the source.The problem is that many people have different names and opinions about their source. Suffice it to say that for simplicity reasons there can only be one source so we call that source the I.
In the Beginning God. So what ever you call that Source we Will use the name 'I AM' as the source.Our human story starts from there commonly called, H-Story or History.
In the Beginning God. So what ever you call that Source we Will use the name 'I AM' as the source.Our human story starts from there commonly called, H-Story or History.
Loving your self first
Loving your self first
How can you prupose to love someone when you have not yet mastered the art of loving yourself? With hidden pet hates and conditionning you want to or have entered into a relationship with another human being. You may have even promised to love them till you die. Have you ever thought of making such a promise to your self first?
How many times have you wished you were like someone else? Maybe in physical appearance, mental capabilities, financial, interlectual or even religious. You are fully equiped for your own personal journey to self discovery.
How can you prupose to love someone when you have not yet mastered the art of loving yourself? With hidden pet hates and conditionning you want to or have entered into a relationship with another human being. You may have even promised to love them till you die. Have you ever thought of making such a promise to your self first?
How many times have you wished you were like someone else? Maybe in physical appearance, mental capabilities, financial, interlectual or even religious. You are fully equiped for your own personal journey to self discovery.
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